Jordanisms


IMG: The Baby might like oranges. Maybe.
hmmm.. I think The Baby might like oranges. Maybe. :D
Seriously. Look at those fingers! heeeeeee!

Let’s talk about the vest he is wearing, shall we? When I was working on it last week, I showed it to Jordan:
me: What do think?
J: It’s uh.. very colourful.
me: Too colourful?
He was leaving the room and he called over his shoulder… Well, let me put it this way… You’d just better hope that it doesn’t make me so jealous that I sell The Baby into slavery.

hehehe… The vest is the Rib Warmer by the brilliant Elizabeth Zimmermann; all I did was scale it down for a baby. Given Jordan’s warning, it has been dubbed the Amazing Technicolor Dreamvest. Here on Ravelry.
IMG: Amazing Technicolor Dreamvest.
While I am tempted to deny that I would ever sully one of EZ’s unventions by knitting it in novelty yarn, The Baby loves the rib warmer and brings it to me to put on him. … so I’ll have to count that as a success, I guess :)

But I’ve been thinking… maybe it needs a matching hat…

Jordan has been after me to teach him to knit on needles. He has been knitting on a loom for a while now, but he wants to do what he calls “real knitting”.
In my frantic cleaning last weekend, I finally found the pair of needles I wanted to use to teach him and we began last night.
I cast on 15 stitches with some blue-grey wool and then showed him the knit stitch as he stood beside me.
Then, he sat on the ottoman in front of me, while we both held the needles and knit.
Then he was on his own. His first two rows needed some pretty extensive repair work, but after that, none of my intervention has been required.
He is a knitter.
His tension is good. He can pick up his own dropped stitches. He can even knit and talk at the same time.

Later last night he was discovered, sitting in my chair by the fire, wearing my shawl, with his feet up on my ottoman… knitting. “Now I’m really doing it!” he exclaimed.
Indeed.

Now, he is sitting, wearing a shawl and knitting as he watches his dad play video games. Mark thinks there is some kind of yarn cult operating out of our family room.
I think he might be right ;)

me: Ew, Jordan, don’t!
J: What? I’m foaming at the mouth.
me:Yeah, I can see that and it’s gross, so don’t do it.
J: It’s not gross if you are the dominant dromedary and it’s rutting season!

Oh.

How’s this for a timely homeschool coincidence?

Exhibit A: Yesterday, Jordan and I began our Astronomy study. We went over some general information and definitions. We looked at lots of pictures and photographs. Overall, we spent about an hour looking at books, websites and a big poster.
Sample Conversation A:
me: [reading from book] .. we will never know the size the Universe…
J: Well, duh!
me: ???
J: The universe is expanding at the speed of light.
me: oh. … … … How did you know that?
J: Mo-ooooooom! It’s COMMON KNOWLEDGE!!
okie dokey.

Exhibit B: Today, in Mad Science, the kids learned… Astronomy. Yay! They were planets orbiting the sun and they dropped astroids from space to see how craters are formed. And the kids made little bouncy planet balls. Very cool and a big hit.
Tonight, I was asking Jordan about what he learned in Mad Science.
Sample Conversation B:
J: K, remember how yesterday we read about the solar system and the planets were in groups?
me: Yes, I remember.
J: And the four planets closest to the sun are the rocky planets?
me: Yes.
J: So do you know what the next group of planets is called?
me: What?
J: They are the gassy giants.
me: Aha! Very cool. So what does that mean?
J: Well, *giggle* is means that Uranus is a gassy giant! [fits of laughter] Get it?! Get it?! Uranus, UR-ANUS is a GASSY Gaint! [more fits of laughter]

My reaction? I laughed my head off.
Right.
Off.
I laughed the twittering guffaw-giggle of an eight year old boy who, with his heart of hearts, believes any joke, conversation or phrase that contains the words “doggy doodoo” is deeply and inherently funny.
Because, on some level and some of the time, each of us is that little boy.
For me, that time was today. For today, I discovered that Uranus is a gassy giant.

*** Understandably, there will be no photos to go with this entry. ***

I’m taking tomorrow “off”.
*cough*
Let me rephrase that… No school tomorrow. Jordan has some math sheets and a reading assignment to work on and that’ll do. I need a day to get organized and get some things done.
For example,
* there is not a single clear horizontal surface in my house. Not one. Anywhere.
* this morning I stood in the bathroom groggily trying to remember why we decided to carpet it. Finally I realized that it isn’t carpet at all. It is mostly-sorted piles of laundry that have become luxury beds for the cats.
* I’d also like to experiment with doing the dishes. I wonder what it would be like to not have the kitchen counters cluttered with them. Cutting edge, I know.
* I think my vacuum still works. I should find some time to check that out.
* The school room… I don’t have words to describe the horror that is the school room.

As well, I have a tonne of writing to do, photos to edit, pages to publish, a bunch of phone calls to make and several completed knitting projects to block.
hmmm.. I might need TWO mental health days!

Jordanism:
I can’t find it! I’ve looked in every nook and cranium!

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